sex

When I was younger a teenager I couldn't wait to have sex and yes just like every other lad I said I had knowing I hadn't but don't we all try to fit in at some point. The 1st time I had sex was when I was 20, it was with Nikita the love of my life she was scared but never put it across but so was I. I had hear'd so many things about it would only last for 2 minutes at that your 1st time but I'm proud to say it was more like two hours. I had no idea what i was doing but it was okay I loved her already. Yet now we have been together for two years it is so much more then sex it is passion and lust and lets face it, is love not just that. We all fall for someone that we have a lust for 1st, we see them across a bar we see them in the shop, in town, in work and we want them we want to kiss them to hold them to make love to them so lust is a lot to do with love. I lust for the feeling of sex with Nikita, don't get me wrong I still look at women you don't stop being attractive to women just because you have the perfect one. I'm not saying all this because I'm sleeping with someone else or anything like that but well I don't know I'm probably just turned on and horny but I crave for the connection each and every day and its just that I find it hard, Nikita has bipolar and doesn't get that lust as much as I do and I tend to be feeling guilty about it more and more. Do I tell her or not, I don't just want sex I want the connection


all this makes no seance to me as well